The Men's Room is Anarchy

I work in a professional building at the Howard Hughes Center in Culver City. I say professional because there are men that wear suits to work. I'm not one of them since I work in the Internet business and we save the suits for the VC guys. Anyway, my point is that given this professional attitude in the office, you'd think it would carry over to all facets of the office. This, unfortunately, is not true. It all breaks down in the Men's Room.

Anything goes in the Men's Room. It's complete and total anarchy. The social rules that allow us to co-exist fly out of the window. These are my observations.

1. Farting is not only allowed, but encouraged - Outside of the Men's room, farts are normally concealed or slipped out quietly where nobody except the farter will notice. In the Men's room, you can be standing at the urinal, or washing your hands, drying your hands, combing your hair, etc., and apparently letting one rip is just fine. Obviously if you're in the stall taking a dump, farts are expected and dealt with. But the deep sigh afterward isn't necessary.

2. Picking your nose - I can't tell you how many times I've either been at a urinal or sitting in the stall and I see dried up boogers on the wall. So let me get this straight. You were standing there with one hand on your rod taking a piss, and the other hand was up your nose digging for gold? Then you thought flicking the booger on the wall was the appropriate thing to do? Is that what Pepperdine teaches in their MBA classes? I thought so. That, and the current street prices of Arabian White.

3. Washing your hands is optional - The only thing between your hand and your shit-caked asshole was three layers of toilet paper. Seriously man, wash your hands. That goes for the guy pissing and picking too. However, I am under the belief that if you take a leak and don't touch your rod directly and don't flush, you should wash your hands before pissing. After all, I know where my rod has been all day. Safe and clean in my boxers. My hands have been touching all sorts of stuff. Why should I put my dirty hands on my clean penis?

What's it like in the Women's Room? Anybody have anything to add?